Do They Know Its Christmas Time?

Before George Lucas and Harrison Ford begin the celebratory back-slap-athon that will surely follow the release of ‘Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull’, we, the fedora-shirking tomb Raiders at Movie Watchmen have unearthed a relic that should remind the hirsute director, and Hollywood’s number one ex-carpenter of much darker times. Not so long ago (1978 to be exact), in a Galaxy too close for comfort (your television set) came the one and only airing of the ‘Star Wars Holiday Special’ (Click the headline above for the full version)

While Lucas and Ford today may not want to look at this ancient evil due to its face-melting potential, the good people who feed global voyeur machine YouTube have ensured this is one Ark that won’t stay shut. The televisual travesty begins with working-Dad Chewbacca’s attempts to make it home for Life Day (read: non-denominational festive cheer), while a slightly pissed off Ford rides shotgun. The whole thing quickly descends into the kind of bland light entertainment gruel that makes ‘Ant & Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway’ seem edgy by comparison. Along the way this train-wreck takes in intergalactic acrobatics, a sit-com set around casa de Chewbacca, never-heard-of-em celebrity cameos and an admittedly decent Boba Fett cartoon (the character’s first appearance), before arriving at the wrong-side-of-the-tracks with this clip.

So prepare to have all your happy childhood Star Wars memories eroded, as you gasp in horror at the sight and sounds of a far-too-earnest Carrie Fisher serenading a mosh-pit of seemingly stoned wookies, choking in a dry ice haze. The whole thing looks like the Eurovision Song Contest if they ever let puppets enter… wait a minute!